What if I told you, a fantasy football league would become more than than just a league, but a platform for the greatest football mind of our generation to shine his brilliance on the masses?
What if I told you that this fantasy commissioner had a long path to greatness?
This is the story of the MFL.
In 2013 Derek Bornemann took over a failing fantasy football league. This league was a dumpster fire. People not paying their entry fees, misguided trades and even…. collusion. Derek didn’t know much about fantasy football, a novice player himself, and he certainly did not know how to manage a league. But with a can do attitude, he decided to give it a “college try”. But much like college itself was for Derek, this would prove to be a waste of time and money.
The 2013 season kicked off with an online draft, that took place in a former members house. The draft and the season itself was uneventful, except for one trade that was “accidentally” accepted by Ben. Derek, then vetoed the trade. Ben went on to accept a similar trade with Robert. Most people have already forgotten who won that year but it laid the ground work for the league as we know it today.
The 2014 season was Derek’s second season at the helm, the young Commissioner was starting to become comfortable at this position. The draft was split between two different locations, one in Derek’s hometown of Lake Wales, the second in Orlando. This was the first time in this leagues history that the draft was split between two different locations. The two different locations became a issue when Derek included two roommates into the league that no one knew. The issue came to a boil when one of Derek’s new additions made some very questionable trades. This was the second time Derek was faced with an issue of collusion. This not only frustrated league members, it also lead the unstable Derek to his breaking point.
At the conclusion of the 2014 MFL season, Derek had become a nervous wreck. The stress of the league led Derek to abusing alcohol and even questioning his own life. Late one night, Derek frantically called the only person he knew that could save this disaster of a league. Mitchell Dohm.
Mitchell was a controversial figure. He certainly had the pedigree of a commissioner, he had been playing fantasy football since the age of 12. He certainly knew the in’s and out’s of the league he was playing in. He’d been a member since 2012. The only black cloud that followed Mitchell was his smooth talking and manipulative nature that he had use time and time again to make trades with players in this league. Some member of the league feared that Mitchell would use this to make rules for his own benefit.
Derek made a decision. He knew that Mitchell was the only person that could save this league… and he was right.
2015 a new light shined upon the MFL. Mitchell Dohm was the new commissioner and he was making some sweeping changes. The first, was that the draft was to be a live, in person draft. There would be no more Auto-draft. No one unknown members of the league. No, instead, everyone got together. Got to know one another and drafted off their personal knowledge, not a computer. Mitchell also took supreme power over all of the decisions made in the league, just until the league started to move smoothly again. It turned out, these were changes were exactly what the league needed. In his first year, Commissioner Dohm took a poorly functioning league and made it into one of the greatest leagues in fantasy football history.
With the great success that was the 2015 season, many league members expected another great season and that’s exactly what happened. The 2016 season cemented the fact that Mitchell Dohm was not only a great person, but the greatest fantasy football manager to ever exist.
The 2017 season brought on a new set of challenges all it’s own. With people moving and drifting apart from the league, the MFL opened it’s arms and accepted four new members for the first time since 2015. The 2017 season also saw Commissioner Dohm releasing some of this power and allowing trade vetoes to move to a committee rather than it just being his decision. This season was a regrettable one at best, the league was decided on a very arbitrary week 16 & 17, where several star players did not play. This resulted in Caleb Reyes winning the league, which was held the same probability odds as a million dollar check coming down from the heavens.
2018 brought some huge changes to the MFL. Mainly, the league shifted to a dynasty format, rather than a redraft. That change led to the greatest league event in league history. The “For The League” scavenger hunt challenge made by new head of the competition committee Jarro Rouse. In this 24hr challenge, member were given a list of tasks that ranged from getting a tattoo, to calling into a country radio station and requesting a Insane Clown Posse song, to asking what animals were best for sacrifices at a petco and of course, how many shots could you take. Whomever had the most points at the end of the night got the rights to the first overall pick. The event was won by Mason Smith, who then traded his first overall pick to Mitchell, for little value. Even with that regrettable move, Mason Smith and his team of Mason Smith’s, won the MFL title and he Jacket…
2019 the second year of our dynasty format started with what was an eventful draft day to say the least. To start the draft day, everyone met at league commissioner (and all around good guy) Mitchell Dohm’s house. The league shared some beers, some laughs but things took a turn for the worst when the PS4 and Fifa was brought out. After some jawing, Derek and Jake grabbed the sticks and played a game. Some background information for those not in the know, Jake is a Fifa player. Like,” play play” plays Fifa. Derek, is not good at Fifa, and to be honest, Derek isn’t good at much (see top bit about Derek being commissioner), so on paper this matchup seems futile to say the least. But then… Derek scores. We laugh. Derek scores again… we laugh harder. Derek scores a third time… we laugh nervously. We… there in that moment… witnessed what was the greatest upset in sports history. Derek beat Jake in Fifa. That basically was the most important thing that happened in 2019.
Alright, I guess I’ll give you the rest of the 2019 season wrap up but only if you twist my arm. 2019 Started just the way we all thought it would, the cream rose to the top early and there was a real chasm separating the top from the bottom. There were some season long surprises, for one, Hanna’s team was way better than some expected, led by her star Cowboys (Dax and Ezek) Hanna went from being a team most thought was highly overrated in Mitchell Dohm’s (Commissioner and all around good guy) preseason poll. Making it in as a 4 seed, Hanna’s Honeys had to face a Goliath of a first round opponent, last years champion Mason and his beloved Mistresses. Hanna, loaded up Emmanuel Sanders in her metaphorical sling shot and launched him right at the Mason, striking him right below his receding hair line and knocking him out. Round one was brutal on the balding men of the MFL, as Mason, Father Tim and Jarro were all knocked out. With top seeded Jarro out of the way, Hanna set her eyes on Jake. She loaded up her Emmanuel Sanders rock into her sling but it shot her right in the foot, Emmanuel scored 1.4 points. So, she reached deep into her bag and pulled out her Miles Sanders rock and killed Jake on the spot, a thunderous earthquake struck the land when Jake hit the ground. With Jake and Mason dead in her wake Hanna only had Ben between her and a Jacket. When Hanna reached Ben’s team in the battle arena, Ben’s team basically hid in the corner and pissed itself, letting Hanna walk right to a championship.
And there it is, all has been made right in the MFL realm, as the evil Mason wasn’t allowed to repeat and a new champion has been crowned. After our season, Gray left the league (I can only imagine because he couldn’t stand the thought of a female champion) and we welcomed in a new owner, Max Dahm.
*Note for the author*
2020 was a year unlike any we had seen before. During a global pandemic, the spirit of American capitalism prevailed, as we still were given basically a normal football season…. now of course there was the occasional Tuesday afternoon game and a couple “they gonna shut down the whole league moments” but none the less, nothing in the way of 2020ness (a word I just made up) made the fantasy football season any different then the previous years.
The 2020 season was one of huge shifts in the landscape of our league. Not only was a new team added, but one owner matured right before our eyes… but first, let’s talk about the new guy. Max inherited what can only be called a “less than ideal” situation. The man started a ground up rebuild by trading Patrick Mahomes in the off season. That along with several key moves took that roster from dead last to overall points champion and in the super bowl very quickly. Needless to say that was a huge jump for a first year owner. Also in 2020, Logan & his legion went from “oh yes I get to play Logan this week” to “Damn it, who’s on the wavier wire, I need extra help, I play Logan this week” in one short year. Although his playoff bid fell short, his team is poised to be in the top 4 in 2021.
Now, I know some of you (mainly Jake) are probably a little mad that I am mentioning Logan in a year recap when he didn’t even make the playoffs. Logan was 3rd last season in moves made, a stat that is only kept by ESPN but only monitored by Mitchell and Mason because they’re the only two in the past who have made 80+ moves in a season… until last season, when Logan did it. Which is a pretty big deal when you consider the amount of “block buster” trades Mitchell and Mason pull off in a year… there’s another shark in the water now.
Speaking of sharks, I’ve done all this reviewing and still haven’t mentioned who was left wearing the jacket when the dust settled. Jake pulled off an amazing playoff run, he didn’t sheepishly make it to the super bowl. Round one he ousted Mason Smith by 30 points, then went on the next week to beat the fantasy demi-god himself, Mitchell’s Lobos by 20 points. That set up a huge super bowl between Jake and first year owner Max Dahm. Jakes team was carried by super star RB Alvin Kamara’s 58 point week, as he beat Max 152-147.
2021: A breath of fresh wind blows through the world. Coming out of covid, stadiums are full again, there’s no more weird Tuesday evening games (jk that was the best) and no last second trips to the COVID list. All seemed to be back to normal… except an ominous dark cloud rose from beyond the skyline. The sound of marching could be heard faintly in the distance… but it was growing louder. The monster (or you could call it a legion) that was created during the 2020 season was in full strength. Logan and his Legion broke the single season MFL scoring recording by more than 200, scoring 1,814 points. Certainly, no one stood a chance against this giant in the playoffs… except one man… one brave man. The face of the MFL itself had to take a stand against the biggest bully of a team that the MFL has ever seen. Mitchell’s Lobos limped into the playoffs as a 7 seed, but quickly took out his father and then #1 seed Derek. Spearheaded by Jaret Patterson and the Chicago Bears defense, the Lobos did the impossible and knocked off the best team the MFL has ever seen. Becoming the first owner to win multiple Super Bowls, Mitchell’s Lobos has certainly made their case for the Hall of Fame.
Did Mitchell’s Lobos unlikely, historic, and dare I say heroic run inspire the little people of the MFL to rise to power? Will preverbal power houses like Logan and Jarro finally get their jackets??? Will someone else step from the shadows and snatch the crown????
Written by Mitchell Dohm
The MFL 