The year was 2004, I was 12 years old, sitting in the private room section of the Hooter in Lakeland (ya know, the one by the mall?) Now, this might not seem weird on the surface, maybe I was there with a little league team or something? But I wasn’t. Not even close. I was there with a bunch of 40-year-olds, drinking beer and making crude comments at the waitress (me not them, I was a very rambunctious 12-year-old). I was with my father and we were drafting his fantasy football team. Father Tim was a lot spryer back in those days. He knew the players, we watched every preseason game we could, at one point in time we used to go to the Buc training camp, just to see how players were looking. Yep, you wouldn’t know it by looking at him, but father time used to be quite the fantasy footballer.
This was before most people had computers, so we’d list out our team and our opponents’ team on a piece of paper every week and keep track of scoring by hand on Sunday. At the end of every week we’d have to drive by the commissioner’s house to get printed out sheets of paper that listed all the leagues matchups that week, overall standings, waiver wire order and free agents. Things were much different than they are today.
Me and my father spent hours upon hours working on our fantasy football team “The 69ers”. Yes that was really his team name… it took me a long time to figure out what it meant, I just thought it was a bad pun. Looking back at it, all these dudes had teams names that involved sex. Crazy times. I was 12… But anyways, it kept us together. It kept us talking. It kept my father and his friends together.
Before we start the 2019 fantasy football season, let not forget why we play fantasy football. It is not about the game. It’s not about the money. It’s about us, having fun together. Talking. Laughing. Making fun of Jake. (Jk love that dude). So, there it is… my yearly reminder that I love you guys. Now it’s time for me to make each of you hate me. Here’s my 2019 week 1 picks.
Adam vs Caleb
What’s with all the Caleb hate lately? *Looks at his team, immediately understands*. Nothing like a starting lineup featuring Payton Barber, Kenyan Drake and OJ Howard. I’d start Courtland Sutton over all three of those… Imo… Adam, still can’t get over the fact that you kept Goff over Baker but hey, what do I know… Outside of that, I feel like not starting Damian Williams is bit of an over correction, I’d start him over Mike Williams… Not that it’s going to matter…
Adam Wins
Jake vs Gray
The battle of the brothers is early this year, a little week 1 spice while the rest of us play tune up games. I am going to be completely honest; Gray’s team is not nearly as bad as it is advertised. OBJ, Josh Gordon, DeDe Westbrook and sneaky guys like Evan Engram and Robby Anderson. If Jordan Howard gets his shit together this could be a decent team. Jakes team is a solid top 5 team, even though the starting lineup is much worse after Mason graped him.. but you know the old saying, “team with the most bench points wins the jacket”
Jake Wins
Hanna vs Tim
The battle over my heart is early this year, a little week 1 spice while the rest of us play tune up games. This is one of those games Hanna is going to have to win if she wants to make the playoffs… PLAYOFFS, you want to talk about playoffs?!? PLAYOFFS. Yep, for a lower/middle class team to make it to the playoffs you have to beat the teams you’re supposed to beat. Yep, that is the kind of gold you read this for. Hunter Henry over MVS this week… Trust me. Father Tim, you just keep Melvin Gordon in your lineup, and I’ll keep tweeting him… eventually he will come back.
Hanna Wins
Ben vs Derek
Well, did I mention playoffs last game… BECAUSE I AM DOING IT AGAIN. These are two teams that are going to be a part of that fight for the last playoff spot and the tie breaker is head to head sooooo kind of an important game. Derek plans to start the entire back field from Denver, which seems as good of an idea as any when you look at the back half of his roster. Ben, doesn’t have Sony Michel in his starting lineup, choosing to go with Allen Robinson instead. Apparently, he has been getting into Derek’s “herbal supplements”. Go ahead and listen to papa, take Robinson out and put Michel in… you’re welcome.
Ben Wins
Mason vs Jarro
This is the “Prime Time” Saturday night game. This is a big one. This one has little playoff implications because Mason will trade away most of his team by the end of the year. There isn’t really much analysis needed here, but teams are good and it’s really a coin flip for who will win. So… I downloaded a coin flip app on my phone… are you ready?? Best of three, Jarro is heads, Mason is tails.
Flip 1- Jarro
Flip 2- Mason
Flip 3- Mason
Well, that was stupid. I am going back old school and just making a decision… so here’s my STONE-COLD LED PIPE LOCK OF THE CENTUREY.
Jarro Wins
Logan vs Mitchell
I really wanted an easier opponent to open the year… like Jake… but instead I get the sneaky playoff bound team in Logan. Here’s what needs to happen for Logan to win…
1stJames Connor needs to have a big game vs New England. Which is likely, the Patriots don’t have a great D and will put up some points.
2ndCooper Kupp needs to be full strength and just as good as he was in the beginning portions of last season.
3rdAt least two or three teams will need be involved in some sort of plane crash, mainly the Giants/Vikings/Jets/Bengals… any of two of those and he has a real chance to pull the upset.
Mitchell Wins
Enjoy the football everyone. It’s the most wonderful time of the year.
The MFL 